Who Took My Picture?!

Over Pesach, we went out to Sachne for the Israeli juggling convention. At night, it got so hot that I slept outside the tent to get more air.

Who took my picture and posted it to the Fail Blog?


see more pwn and owned pictures

(no, it's really not us - Yaakov closed the tent so the mosquitoes wouldn't get in. Plus, I was wearing flannel pants, not jeans)

Trish and Bob

I wrote this when I was in college. It has some inaccuracies and some problems, but I thought I'd put it out there anyway... it has some interesting points. Comments are welcome, but please be polite.

------

Okay, who are Trish and Bob?

No, wait. don't make this sound like the dating game. This is Tisha B'av, a holiday, not a couple. In fact, as holidays go, this one is pretty anti-couple.

Why?

Well, it's a sad day, so we don't do happy-couple things.

I see. So what IS Tisha B'av? What does the name mean?

Well, the name means "the ninth of Av" and Av is a Jewish month, following Tammuz and preceding Elul.

Pretty straightforward name, not too original.

No, not very, but then again, it's not a particularly happy day, not one you want to give a special name to..

What's so sad about it?

Well. The first and second temples in Jerusalem were destroyed on this day.

So we're mourning the tearing down of a building?

No, we're mourning a lot more. You see, the destruction of the temple not only meant losing a large war in a big way. It didn't even just mean a lot of deaths. It meant the destruction of a country and way of life.

But we're still Jews. They didn't destroy our way of life.

Wrong. Our way of life was centered around the sacrifices brought in the temple. If a person sinned unintentionally, they brought a sacrifice. On holidays, people brought sacrifices to the temple. The Cohanim lived and worked for the temple. When a woman gave birth to a baby, she brought a sacrifice, and when the high priest came out of the holy of holies on the afternoon of Yom Kippur, the day was suddenly transformed from the solemnest to the happiest day of the year, and the girls wore their white dresses and danced in the fields. On Sukkot, the simchat beit hashoeva was the happiest, biggest, most impressive party ever seen. No.Our way of life was destroyed. We rebuilt it, slowly, over a few hundred years, but it's nothing like how it was.

I see, I think. But why don't we build a new one?

Well, there are a lot of reasons. The first being that we don't know exactly where the holy of holies stood, and no one is allowed to go to that place -except the high priest on yom kippur in the afternoon service, that is. That's actually the best reason, because almost everything else can be worked around. We have the blue dye for the priests' clothing, we have the measurements for ever inch of the building.We don't have a red heifer, but we could probably get one, and even if we don't we could still offer sacrifices on the temple mount, because we're all equally impure...but we don't have the full knowledge that wee need to find the holy of holies, so it's all pointless.

so it's lost and gone forever? why?

Well. It's not forever. We tend to believe that when the messiah comes, we will rebuild it. But in answer to why, well. It seems like it was our own fault. You see, in the time of the first temple, the vast majority of the world was composed of idol-worshipers, and being very much into "cultural relativism" and "political correctness", we got into that too. I mean, we did some really bad stuff, to the point where within sight of our holiest place, the temple, we had human sacrifices going on. Pretty terrible, really. So G-d sent the Babylonians to put us in our place, or maybe to get us out of his. That was in 586 bce.


Now, these two guys, Ezra and Nechemia, decided to come back to Jerusalem and rebuild the Jewish nation both physically and spiritually. They did a nice job, rebuilt the temple, the country, and the nation. These were the people who began the custom of reading from the torah every week. They made a fairly spectacular second temple, which held up until 70ce.

Why was the second temple destroyed?

Well, you see, we got into a pattern of causeless hatred of our fellow man. For example, there was a case of two men with similar names being confused, and the wrong one being invited to a party. Instead of the host being hospitable and allowing the wrong guest to remain, the host publicly asked the man to leave the party, and when the man said he was willing to pay for his food rather than be embarrassed in such a way, the host refused, and made him leave.

That's pretty mean

Yeah, G-d thought so too, I suppose. That is, I suppose that G-d believed that a nation of people who would do such things wasn't a nation fit to be a "light unto the world", and since we weren't fulfilling our part of the bargain, the Romans were sent to help G-d stop fulfilling his. From then, 70ce, until 1948ce, we didn't have a country.

That's almost 2000 years

Yes, and in those two thousand years, the Jewish people has been persecuted over and over again, in every country in the world. The Crusades, The blood libels, the Spanish inquisition, the pogroms, the HOLOCAUST, and the list continues to build. Even in our own country, we are threatened daily. The independence war, the Yom Kippur war, the War of Attrition, the Six-Day War, the Munich Games Massacre, Entebbe, The Intifada, The scuds during the Gulf War, and the list of bus bombings seems endless. Even just in the past year, we've had three major bus bombings, and a huge bombing in one of the nation's busiest malls, not to mention the bombing of the Jewish Community Center in Argentina. (note: this was written in 1996 or 1997)

I see what you mean. Since the Romans expelled us from our land, it's all been one nightmare after another.

Exactly.

So what's it about this day that makes it so unlucky?

Lashon Hara.

What? Isn't that a type of dance?

No. Lashon means tongue, and Hara means "the bad". That is, when you speak badly of someone or something, even if it's true, it's a sin, and it's called Lashon Hara

Where does THAT fit into Tisha B'av?

Well, before we came into Israel, we sent spies to check out the land. We sent 12, and ten came back with fairly lousy reports. In other words, they spoke out against the land G-d had promised us, a land flowing with milk and honey. Now the people got scared because of their reports, and thy started to cry. Supposedly, that day was the ninth of av, and G-d made sure that we had something Real to cry about on that day.

So, aside from crying, and not doing happy-couple things, what else do we do or not do on Tisha B'av?


Well, we don't bathe, shower, swim, or even wash our hands.

Wait, that's gross. You have to wash your hands when you come out of the bathroom, right?

Yes, but unless there is dirt on the hand, you can only wash from the knuckle to the top of the finger.

Okay, is there more?

Yes, you can't eat or drink anything, unless you are pregnant, nursing, under age 12, or sick. You have to read megillat Eycha, and kinot, and you can't wear leather shoes, and it's preferable to sit on low chairs.

Is that it?

Yeah

Whew, that list was getting long. It seems like we have to be in total mourning.

We do. And doesn't it make sense to? Look at all we've lost.

Feelin' Kroovy!*

*Kroovy is the Hebrew name for the character Grover!

So my sister went to San Francisco, and she met Grover, for real. See here.

Me? I went to the mall and had a chocolate souffle... so hey, I can't really complain!

I Think She's Teasing Me

Today, while Kinneret was sitting in her high chair, eating a salmon cutlet (fishie schnitzel!), she gave Poofy a piece.

"Kinneret," I cried "we don't feed Poofy!"

She mumbled something back at me which for all the world sounded like "well, I do" with appropriate intonation.

I swear she can talk, she's just holding out on me.

Good Day!

Today, I decided I was going to have a good day. I took Kinneret and we went to the gym. I put her in the babysitting, and I did 30 lengths at the pool (not great, but not too bad either).
I'm currently at precisely the weight I was when I started my pregnancy (not bad for 15 weeks).

Of course, tonight my appetite went wild (it was only chicken, but it was a LOT of chicken), so we'll see how long that lasts.

Anyway, I spent about 1.5 hours in the pool with Kinneret, who was in a kamikaze mood today. She kept trying to drown herself, and I kept having to force her to keep her head above water. (She wanted to sit down - on the floor, not on my lap - even though the depth is such that it lands her mouth and nose under water.)

When we got home, she crashed for a good 2.5 hours. I took a shower and then found my own crash site... I love to sleep.

When we woke up, I made her an omelet, and then our friends Bethami and Eden (3) came over. It was very nice seeing them. Eden wanted to hug Kinneret all the time, and Kinneret seemed a bit indifferent to the affection, but it was pretty cute anyway. I wish I'd taken pictures. We'll have to invite them back soon!

By the time Bethami and Eden left, it was time to take Poofy for a walk and meet Yaakov at the bus stop. Yay!

Psalm for Today

In memory of Ehud Goldwasser and Eldad Regev.

א אל-נקמות יהוה; אל נקמות הופיע.
ב הינשא, שופט הארץ; השב גמול, על-גאים.
ג עד-מתיי רשעים יהוה: עד-מתיי, רשעים יעלוזו.
ד יביעו ידברו עתק; יתאמרו, כל-פועלי אוון.
ה עמך יהוה ידכאו; ונחלתך יענו.
ו אלמנה וגר יהרוגו; ויתומים ירצחו.
ז ויאמרו, לא יראה-יה; ולא-יבין, אלוהי יעקוב.
ח בינו, בוערים בעם; וכסילים, מתיי תשכילו.
ט הנוטע אוזן, הלוא ישמע; אם-יוצר עין, הלוא יביט.
י היוסר גויים, הלוא יוכיח: המלמד אדם דעת.
יא יהוה--יודע, מחשבות אדם: כי-המה הבל.
יב אשרי, הגבר אשר-תייסרנו יה; ומתורתך תלמדנו.
יג להשקיט לו, מימי רע-- עד ייכרה לרשע שחת.
יד כי, לא-ייטוש יהוה עמו; ונחלתו, לא יעזוב.
טו כי-עד-צדק, ישוב משפט; ואחריו, כל-ישרי-לב.
טז מי-יקום לי, עם-מרעים; מי-יתייצב לי, עם-פועלי אוון.
יז לולי יהוה, עזרתה לי-- כמעט, שכנה דומה נפשי.
יח אם-אמרתי, מטה רגלי; חסדך יהוה, יסעדני.
יט ברוב שרעפיי בקרבי-- תנחומיך, ישעשעו נפשי.
כ היחוברך, כיסא הוות; יוצר עמל עלי-חוק.
כא יגודו, על-נפש צדיק; ודם נקי ירשיעו.
כב ויהי יהוה לי למשגב; ואלוהיי, לצור מחסי.
כג וישב עליהם, את אונם-- וברעתם יצמיתם;
יצמיתם, יהוה אלוהינו

Psalm 94

1 O LORD, the God who avenges,
O God who avenges, shine forth.

2 Rise up, O Judge of the earth;
pay back to the proud what they deserve.

3 How long will the wicked, O LORD,
how long will the wicked be jubilant?

4 They pour out arrogant words;
all the evildoers are full of boasting.

5 They crush your people, O LORD;
they oppress your inheritance.

6 They slay the widow and the alien;
they murder the fatherless.

7 They say, "The LORD does not see;
the God of Jacob pays no heed."

8 Take heed, you senseless ones among the people;
you fools, when will you become wise?

9 Does he who implanted the ear not hear?
Does he who formed the eye not see?

10 Does he who disciplines nations not punish?
Does he who teaches man lack knowledge?

11 The LORD knows the thoughts of man;
he knows that they are futile.

12 Blessed is the man you discipline, O LORD,
the man you teach from your law;

13 you grant him relief from days of trouble,
till a pit is dug for the wicked.

14 For the LORD will not reject his people;
he will never forsake his inheritance.

15 Judgment will again be founded on righteousness,
and all the upright in heart will follow it.

16 Who will rise up for me against the wicked?
Who will take a stand for me against evildoers?

17 Unless the LORD had given me help,
I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death.

18 When I said, "My foot is slipping,"
your love, O LORD, supported me.

19 When anxiety was great within me,
your consolation brought joy to my soul.

20 Can a corrupt throne be allied with you—
one that brings on misery by its decrees?

21 They band together against the righteous
and condemn the innocent to death.

22 But the LORD has become my fortress,
and my God the rock in whom I take refuge.

23 He will repay them for their sins
and destroy them for their wickedness;
the LORD our God will destroy them.

My Latest Concept

Here's my latest idea that would make me rich if I could build it, program it, patent it, and market it...

A Wifi baby monitor. Here's how it would work. You plug in the baby monitor next to baby. If baby makes too much noise, then everyone on your LAN would receive an alert saying "baby is crying."

It would then open a chat window so that all the members of the household who are awake and online could debate whose turn it is to get the baby.

This is absolutely necessary in my home, since Yaakov watches his movies or plays his piano with earphones while I listen to music with earphones while I work at night.

Something's Happening...

I haven't posted in over a month. Sorry about that folks. I've kind of been in a not-so-bloggy place lately.

First the big news - I'm pregnant! I'm due Jan 9th or thereabouts. Part of the reason I haven't blogged is because at first, I was having really bad doubts about this pregnancy. I had pains that I thought might mean it was ectopic, and I just had weird emotional stuff that didn't let me believe it was ok.

Then I went to a doctor who I decided I don't like so much, and he almost refused to do an ultrasound. I basically had to tell him that I thought it might be ectopic. He refused to take a measurement, so I almost missed my chance to do a neuchal translucency. Fortunately, that was taken care of, and the numbers are good.

Lately, I've just been extremely tired, and while I have a lot to say, I don't seem to be able to organize it into a blog post.

And then, Kinneret turned one!

She's so sweet. Here's a picture of her enjoying her new tricycle (a gift from Aunt Rachel and Uncle Ohad & family).
Also visible is Poofy, who is a big fan of Kinneret's newest trick - giving all of her food to the dog instead of eating it. Fortunately, she does seem to be getting enough into her mouth - her face has thinned out some, but she still has baby-folds in her arms and legs!

In other exciting news, Rachel Inbar has moved her blog to here.

New on the blogroll is Chez Perky, with 1 midi perky and 3 mini perkies for four times the perkiness of the other leading blog!

DrSavta (and RabbiSaba) are doing a coast-to-coast tour of the USA.

A Mother in Israel is way more ambitious than I'd ever be. She's even washing her floor!

And that's pretty much all the news for right now... so stay tuned for the next exciting adventure of.... trrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiLcat!

DUCK!

Today, Kinneret said her first word, Duck!
I was singing her the Waddles song (my own composition) and she said duh and dut and several other sounds that sounded like she was trying to say duck!

Yay for Kinneret!

An Israeli War Song

This is a song written years and years ago. It was remade this year, and it still rings true.

After the attack on Ashkelon yesterday, it seems very much like we're at war, whether the government says so or not. The translation follows the Hebrew.

האם את בוכה או צוחקת?

פגז אחרון התפוצץ ושתק,
עטפה הדממה את העמק.
ילדה בגדות יצאה ממקלט,
ואין בתים עוד במשק.
אמא, היה לנו בית ירוק
עם אבא ובובה ושסק.
הבית איננו, ואבא רחוק,
אימי את בוכה או צוחקת?

הביטי למעלה, בתי, אל ההר,
ההר שהיה כמפלצת.
עוד יש תותחים, ילדתי, על ההר,
אך הם מאיימים על דמשק.

הביטי למעלה, בתי, לגולן,
שם יש חיילים, אך להבא -
דגלם בצבעים של כחול ולבן,
בוכה וצוחק שם גם אבא.
יהיה לנו בית ירוק, ילדתי,
עם אבא ובובה ושסק,
ולא עוד אימה, ילדתי, ילדתי,
בתי, את בוכה או צוחקת?

שקיעות באדום וזריחות בזהב
פוגשות בירוק ובמים.
ובלי תותחים של אויב על ההר
יוריק עוד העמק כפליים.

זורם הירדן, מתפתל כשיכור,
פריחה את העמק נושקת.
ואיש לא יסב את מימיו לאחור,
בתי, את בוכה או צוחקת.
זורם הירדן, בין גדות יעבור,
פריחה את העמק נושקת,
ואיש לא יסב את מימיו לאחור,
בתי, את בוכה או צוחקת.
בתי, את בוכה או צוחקת.


Are You Crying or Laughing?

The last shell exploded and was quiet
The valley was wrapped in silence
A girl in [Kibbutz]Gadot left the shelter
And there are no more houses in the farm

"Mom, we had a green house
with Dad and a doll and a loquat [tree]
The house is gone and Daddy is far
Mom are you crying or laughing?"

"Look up, my daughter, at the mountain
The mountain that was like a monster
There are still cannons, my child, on the mountain,
But they threaten Damascus

"Look up, my daughter, to the Golan,
There are soldiers there, but from now on -
Their flag is colored blue and white,
Up there, Dad is crying and laughing too
We'll have a green house, my little girl,
With Daddy and a doll and a loquat
And no more fear, my girl, my girl
My daughter are you crying or laughing?

"Sunsets in red and sunrises in gold
Meet in the green and the water.
And without enemy cannons on the mountain
The valley will be twice as green.

"The Jordan flows, turning like a drunkard
The flowers of the valley it kisses
And no one will turn its waters back
My daughter, are you crying or laughing?
The Jordan flows, through [Kibbutz] Gadot it passes
The flowers of the valley it kisses
And no one will turn its waters back
My daughter, are you crying or laughing?
My daughter, are you crying or laughing?"

The Good, the Bad, and the Beautiful

Passover is a great holiday. Seder this year was a bit hectic, as we piled 12 adults and 13 children into a living room/dining room area that seats 14 comfortably.

The Shabbat meals were fairly quiet, as Yaakov, Kinneret, and I hosted just my brother Ben. The food was a little sparse with no matza and all the bread eaten on plastic before the meal proper... (sorry Ben).

And then... we get to the good part. Each year, there is an Israeli juggling convention (IJC) held in Gan Hashlosha (Sachne) which is located between Afula and Beit She'an in the Beit She'an Valley.
(My dad claims it's in the Jezreel Valley, but it belongs to the Beit She'an Valley Council.)

I love juggling! I love jugglers. They're great people. I love juggling festivals. I don't love camping, but I'm willing to make the effort, as long as I have enough food. I really really really don't love traveling on multiple buses with my baby and lots of luggage. However, we examined all of our options, and sent up a big bag with Scott, and we went up by bus on Monday morning. We left at ten am, made a few stops at the central bus station in Tel Aviv, and got to Gan Hashlosha at three pm. It was hot and I was worn out from traveling, so Yaakov agreed to put together the tent and watch the baby so I could go swimming with Scott and his girls.

We swam. The water there is beautiful. The next day, I took Kinneret with me into the water. She was a little scared of it at first, but eventually, she calmed down and seemed to be having a good time.

The water there is beautiful, and there are fish in the water. The downsides to the convention: It was VERY VERY hot during the day, rising over 45 C (113 F). You can say "but it's a dry heat" as many times as you want, but when you're going through a liter an hour of water and you still don't have to go to the bathroom...

The gym, which usually stays cool all day got so hot that the few jugglers there wilted and could barely juggle. There was no air-conditioning available most of the time. The tent was so hot that I had a panic attack from feeling like I couldn't breathe the air inside of it.

In the evenings, it cooled down nicely. Friends and I cooked meals, and there was plenty of food this time. (Thanks to the Bar Yaakovs, Trachtmans, and Seltzers for their cooperation in feeding me and baby K. Sorry there were eggs in the cake, vegans.) On Wednesday, I hitched a ride to Beit She'an with M. Trachtman, and we spent a long time in the well-airconditioned supermarket. I picked up a cake for my birthday (which was Shabbat, April 19th, so passed with little fanfare. Thanks parents for the new outfit, and thanks Rach for the pearls!) and told the Bar Yaakov and Seltzer children that anyone who wanted cake had to sing happy birthday to me. It was a neat party out on a straw mat in the cool evening air.

The best parts were swimming in the natural spring, making some new friends and spending time with old friends, and Kinneret's big moment! At one of the shows, there were some technical difficulties, so they asked volunteers to come up and showcase whatever they want in order to amuse people. (With some assistance from Yaakov,) Kinneret went up on stage, sat there, and held three small rings (linked together) in her hands. I announced "Kinneret with three rings" and she got a huge round of applause. As we took our seats, Kinneret was asked for her autograph several times.

The down sides of the convention... There were mosquitoes and other biting insects. I'm still bitten up. Fortunately, Kinneret seems to be bite-less, and Yaakov was more careful about not getting bitten (not to mention that the aforementioned panic attack led me to sleep outside the tent all three nights whereas Yaakov and Kinneret slept inside the tent). It was insanely hot. The worst part, though, was that Yaakov was sick, so we ended up going home a day early (which was a relief in some ways), and we missed the big show with the international guests.

The beautiful:

Nir David at Twilight

Pesach Food

So Pesach is coming again, way too fast.

Mother-in-Israel said that I should post my favorite recipe, so here it is. It's a recipe for apple kugel that's so good that I would make it with matza even during the year. My mom says that it's from an out-of-print cookbook. It's not easy to make, unless you have a kosher for pesach food processor, but it's soooo worth the effort! I generally don't like sweet kugels, but this one's a real winner. I confess, though, that I have been known to eat it with vanilla ice cream...

Apple Kugel

3 matzot
6 eggs
½ cup sugar
½ tsp salt
¼ tsp cinnamon
½ c raisins
½ c chopped almonds
4 tart apples, peeled and grated (this is where you'll wanna use the food processor)
cinnamon sugar mix (1/4 t cinnamon and 1 T sugar)
¼ c oil

Crumble matzos into water and soak until soft. Squeeze out excess moisture. Beat eggs. Add sugar, salt, & cinnamon. Continue beating until well blended. Stir crumbled matzos, raisins, almonds, apples, and orange rind into the egg mixture. Place in well-greased 1 ½ quart casserole. Sprinkle with sugar cinnamon mix and pour oil over all. Bake at 175 C degrees until firm and nicely browned. (about 45 minutes.)

Hopefully, I'll be writing some tips on how to stay sane for Pesach cleaning, and how to keep within budget over the next few weeks, but I have to get my legos out of the laundry (just kidding. We don't generally EAT our lego.)


For more great recipes, check out Spice and Spirit.

Why I Can't Keep up with the Laundry

7am

It begins in the morning. Kinneret is wearing the clothes she slept in. Her diaper is blessedly still holding. I change the diaper and feed her a bottle without mishap. I'm wearing my pj's, because I don't have to go out yet.

Yaakov has dumped his yesterday's clothes, undershirt, etc on the floor. I dutifully pick up the socks (which aren't actually standing up on their own, so all is well).

8am
Today's a sheet-changing day, so I strip the beds. N0 problem.

9am
Kinneret eats a yogurt for breakfast. She cooperates. There's not even a lot of yogurt on the bib.


10am
Naptime. I've finished the first load of laundry, including folding. Neither Kinneret nor I have changed clothes. We're doing great!

I take the silk blanket off of Yaakov's bed, fold it, put it away. He hasn't used a blanket in about 4 weeks. Heck, he's already complained that the flannel sheet I gave him instead of a blanket is too darned hot, even with the fan on.

I put clean sheets on the beds. We don't have enough pillowcases, so we'll have to wait for them to come back from the machine later.

12pm
Kinneret needs lunch. Great. There's some baked sweet potato in the fridge. I mush up the inside and warm it up, and Kinneret digs in. Literally. With both hands. Much of it ends up in her mouth. Also much of it ends up in her outfit and on the bib.

1pm
change Kinneret's clothes. Into the pile they go. Cuddle some. Kinneret is tired, so she goes for a nap.
Put away clothes, realize that the next wash isn't in yet. Uh-oh. Put in the next wash.

4pm
Poofy needs a walk, and Kinneret could use some air too. Great! We'll go see how the new train station is coming along. I change into clothes (yes, still in pajamas up until this point.) Pajamas could do with a wash... into the pile they go.

4:30pm
We go towards the train station. After Kinneret's hat takes a few trips to the sidewalk, it goes under the stroller. Train station is not currently stroller-accessible. We'll have to take a look next week maybe.

4:45pm
There are loads and loads of ladybugs! They're really pretty. We count over 25, including 4 pairs in the process of "pairing up."

5pm
We get home, and Kinneret is hungry. I give her a bottle of milk which she downs in 2 seconds flat.

5:05pm
I pick Kinneret up because she looks like she needs a burp. She becomes a fountain. That bottle of milk... well, it's on the floor (and her, and me) now.
Change all of my clothes, get back into pajamas. Give Kinneret a bath, changing her clothes again. (and of course, when I went to get her into the bath, the diaper was dirty.)

7:30pm
I have an appointment. My mom comes over while I put Kinneret to bed, and then I get ready for my appointment (getting into new clothes). Pajama top is sweaty. Into the pile.

8:30pm
I come home, realize that I look like a wreck and want to look nice for Yaakov. Shower. Change into something nicer. Previous clothes were sweaty. Into the pile.

9:30pm
Yaakov helps me finish making the bed. Poofy promptly gets in... great. Doggy sheets.

10pm
Bedtime. Change into pajamas. Previous clothes can actually go back into the closet. this time.