Tuesday, January 17, 2006

How many ends does one candle have?

O is doing very well considering the trauma she went through this weekend, and Yaakov is really being the perfect patient, so why am I feeling so burnt out?

I feel like being out of the house is just shy of criminal. O went to work today, and she asked if I was in the mood to rent a dvd, so I met her at her work at the end of the day and we got some groceries and a dvd together.

Got home and made yaakov dinner. he wanted soft-boiled eggs & toast. I wanted to make pasta for me, so I got the water boiling, and then O asked if I would make brown rice pasta for her cuz when she made it for herself, it got all mushy, so sure, no prob. except I broke a pot last week, meaning I don't have enough pots to boil eggs and brown rice pasta and regular pasta...
So I made her pasta first, and then mine, and made Yaakov's eggs in parallel, and used my sandwich maker to make him toast. (don't have a toaster).

And O's mom came over and brought O's dog, which meant Poofy had a tantrum, but he recovers quickly, so no biggie.

I didn't even have to walk him, cuz O came to the rescue and took him out. So basically, I'm not having it that rough. I'm just being fussy. And I feel completely burnt out.

The worst of it is, I'd actually be worse off if either of them wasn't here. At least I feel in control and like everything is reasonably ok when I have them both in my sight.

When did I become mother to the known universe? why am I like this? Why can't I just let go?
And why can't my boss see that I have no work now, and I'd do the company more good taking a couple days of unpaid vacation???

It will get better. Until then, there's both chocolate brownie and cookies & cream in the freezer...